Look! A *real* journal post (not a meme, not a quiz!)

[spedbug]

Mr. Bug's company is offering disability insurance to its employees. There's the option to buy group disability insurance or go solo and buy an independent policy. Because there's more than one option, the insurance agent has come to our home to show us all his boring booklets and share all his boring factoids. Insurance. Necessary, yes. Thrilling, no.

Because of our schedules, the insurance agent has come to our house at 8pm on two separate nights. Both nights he didn't leave until 10pm. As I've probably mentioned before, I'm not a very social person. He's a very nice guy and easy to talk to, in general, but at 10pm there are few people I want remaining in my house other than my immediate family (unless it's a party). So, the last time he was over, I was getting a little stir crazy sitting there listening to his spiel.

Finally, at about 9:45pm, I couldn't take it anymore and laid my cards out on the table. "It's best you leave the information and let me read it because I just don't absorb spoken instructions and information well. You'd have a better chance of me understanding it if you sang it to me." I don't remember how it degenerated so quickly but after a bit of witty interchange, I proclaimed, "To tell you the truth, when it comes to stuff like this, you'd be better off explaining it through interpretive dance."
"Interpretive dance?" he exclaimed, in disbelief.

Can you guess what I did?

Yes. I got up from the table and did a short, interpretive dance that represented disability insurance. I tippy-toed sideways toward the refrigerator, arms over my head. Then, I did a lurching, jerking movement to represent an injury before doing a "I'm lame", limping dance toward the counter. There, I changed roles and did a small ballet step while miming someone giving out cash. Changing roles, again, I became the disabled dancer and accepted the money with a gasp, smile and a short, jubilant dance back to my chair.

To give credit where it's due, the insurance agent just laughed. Earlier in the meeting, I had commented that he must meet a lot of "odd", interesting people in his line of work. I think I became one of them.

Comments

That does it...

[amyleaton.livejournal.com]

I'd like to friend ya, if you don't mind. I couldn't stand it if I missed another post like this! :-)

Re: That does it...

[amyleaton.livejournal.com]

By the way, I'm AmyMS88 on bookcrossing...

Ah, yes. Hi, Amy. :)

[spedbug.livejournal.com]

I friended you, too.

Re: That does it...

[bookczuk.livejournal.com]

Thwacks self on head. That's YOU???

Amys need to stick together. I'd like to friend you too.

Amy/czuk

oh, I see what's happening here. . .

[antof9.livejournal.com]

You're making your own little Amy-Paradise here. Soon you'll be shunning all the Margarets and Gails and Allis. How rude.

Re: oh, I see what's happening here. . .

[spedbug.livejournal.com]

We won't shun you, we'll just smile, smug in the knowledge that, soon, Amys will seize the monopoly, here, and we can charge you exorbitant fees to post in our threads! Bwahahahahahahahahahaaha!

Re: oh, I see what's happening here. . .

[bookczuk.livejournal.com]

What she said!

(If I reply to this, does antie get the response automatically to since speddy was replying to her post?) Threads get me soooooo confused sometimes.

Re: oh, I see what's happening here. . .

[spedbug.livejournal.com]

I'm mostly clueless about this but I think Antie doesn't get it if you respond to me, only if you respond to her post, directly. BUT, if she started the thread and you responded to something I said, she does get it.

Maybe.

Re: oh, I see what's happening here. . .

[antof9.livejournal.com]

I didn't get these others, for what it's worth :)

ROFL!

[rendiru.livejournal.com]

I would have paid to see his face during your dance!

I don't entertain and can be very uncomfortable with people, especially sales people, coming over to my house. To stay past 9:00 (twice!) would be too much for me too. I would have had to leave the room and have S boot them before I became too snippy. I tend to get rather abrupt when strangers push my limits too far - he's very lucky that he was at your house and not mine. :-)

I can be snippy, too, depending on the circumstances.

[spedbug.livejournal.com]

This night, however, I was in an odd mood and decided everyone was going to share it with me.

Generosity has its rewards

[rendiru.livejournal.com]

I'm sure you've made a lasting impression. ;-)

Perhaps he'll even follow your advice and let you just read the information for a while now.

[fsr44.livejournal.com]

I suspect he'll be back, if only to catch your "Deductible Dream Ballet".

[spedbug.livejournal.com]

Yes, that and the "Financial Planning Fandango". *sigh*

[texaswren.livejournal.com]

If someone overstays their welcome, (which can be as early as 15 minutes after their arrival, depending on who they are), Johnnie says, "Aren't you people ever going to go home?" He laughs, and they aren't ever sure if he is serious, but they usually leave soon after.

I would have given a bunch to be a fly on your wall tonight. ;-)

Perfect!

[spedbug.livejournal.com]

The next appointment (financial planning) is the week after next. can I borrow Johnnie? ;)

Re: Perfect!

[madame-urushiol.livejournal.com]

Johnnie's kind of intimidating in person--he can say anything with a smile, but there's an edge behind those stunning blue eyes that makes you wonder if he just might crack if you pushed him too far. Formidable, really. Just what you need!

You know this guy is going to be dining out on that story for months. I, however, am picturing a sales rep in a tutu and think it's a very fine mental image.

I hate sales reps, detest being "sold" anything, and have about zero tolerance for the personality type that gets into and succeeds in sales. 99.999% of sales reps have never actually learned to listen to the customer's needs--they're too ready with their next pat answer to "overcome objections" and close the sale. I was extremely rude to the Chemlawn sales rep when he called for the third time this evening wanting to sell me additional services. It felt goooood. ;)

Re: Perfect!

[antof9.livejournal.com]

I, however, am picturing a sales rep in a tutu and think it's a very fine mental image.

Do they make those in a 60/40 polyesther blend?

(and of course, now I want to meet Johnnie even more than before!)

[kitsunecharmed.livejournal.com]

*wild applause*

*STANDING OVATION*

Encore! Encore!

Welcome home!

[spedbug.livejournal.com]

[does a special, happy dance, a la Snoopy]

[atabei.livejournal.com]

We need video-posts here on LJ...
Urgently.
;-)

[spedbug.livejournal.com]

Don't tempt me, Frodo!

[sunneschii.livejournal.com]

Hehe!

I´ve always known BC are some kind of crazy people! Love it!


But watch out! He may come back and dance with you!!;-)

[spedbug.livejournal.com]

Nothing would have made my night more than having him get up and start dancing, too. I could've sailed through the rest of this week with a grin on my face if he turned out to be as capricious as I am.

[angelchild.livejournal.com]

Ha ha ha..... You'd think he would have shot out the door like a shot wouldnt you lol

I HATE salesmen/tradesmen that outstay their welcome.... will try the dance thing on the next one i have here ;o)

[spedbug.livejournal.com]

The shame is, he's really quite a nice guy. If he weren't selling something with a boredom level of code red I probably wouldn't have minded so much. After the first hour of talking insurance, however, my brain was turning to mush and all I was hearing was a low buzzing sound when he opened his mouth. :oP It's my flaw; I think I'm missing important "grown up" brain cells.

Oh man

[yokospungeon.livejournal.com]

You are the Don. Hats off to you darling.

:)

Next time he turns up say "Look, I've only got 30 minutes before my neighbours turn up for their Eurythmics class. Look likely sunshine, or I'll have you in a leotard faster than you can say negative equity."

Re: Oh man

[spedbug.livejournal.com]

As I said to sunneschii, if I could've gotten him up and dancing,it would have made my week. I'm happy to give in to my childishness, it's true, but I'm happiest if I can get someone to join my silliness - especially someone in a dress shirt and tie. :-D

Spedbug, you rock!

[kairon13.livejournal.com]

Oh, that has so brightened up a grey Manchester morning!

*blowing you bubbles*

Re: Spedbug, you rock!

[spedbug.livejournal.com]

Weee, bubbles! ....
...
...
Hey! Bubbles! Next meeting, when I start feeling like I'm about to bang my forehead against the table out of sheer boredom, I could quietly get up, get some bubbles and fill the room full of joy!

Re: Spedbug, you rock!

[kairon13.livejournal.com]

What a glorious thought!

[bookczuk.livejournal.com]

"Brilliant!", she says, tipping her hat as she executes a flawless pirouet.

[spedbug.livejournal.com]

Yes, join the troupe, czukie....we'll hire ourselves out to insurance companies to help make their sales pitch more palatable to the average joe.

[bookczuk.livejournal.com]

WEll...actually, I should have typed "Tripping her hat" to give you a better example of my grace. And the thought of me in a tutu is scary!

Excellent!

[buffra.livejournal.com]

That sounds so fun! Maybe we should try it for all kinds of boring stuff -- budget meetings? Dance! Council meetings? Dance! Job interviews? Dance!! The unemployment office? Dance!!

interpretive dance

[(Anonymous)]

spedbug - I've seen you do that dance before. Never knew you were trying to get rid of me - thought you just had too much to drink!

Is this "The Rubberband", Omi or Tenety?

[spedbug.livejournal.com]

If you've seen me do that dance before, you know me well enough to know I don't even need that much to drink to act like an idiot....and you'd also know your company is MORE than welcome. :)

how in the HELLLLLL

[antof9.livejournal.com]

Did I miss this post?!

SpedBug -- you darling, darling girl. You are my idol.

And although the interpretive dance comments were funny in and of themselves, after reading this, they're doubly so.

Big

Wet

Smooches

(BWS)

Re: how in the HELLLLLL

[spedbug.livejournal.com]

Big
Wet
Smooches


I'm not even going to wipe that off; that's how much I wuvvums you!

(PS - You know what I like about LJ? The fact that I can say all the cliquey, favoritism things I want without feeling they're being tallied).

Re: how in the HELLLLLL

[antof9.livejournal.com]

(PS - You know what I like about LJ? The fact that I can say all the cliquey, favoritism things I want without feeling they're being tallied).

Me friggin too :)

[o-jenny.livejournal.com]

Oh my! I almost wet myself laughing at this!! If you don't mind, I'm going to friend you so I can be sure to get the whole story on the Financial Planning Fandango (I've already got the little footprint diagram forming in my head). :-D

[spedbug.livejournal.com]

Thanks for letting me know you plan on friending me. I'll friend you, in return, once you do.

[kitsunecharmed.livejournal.com]

I can't believe this was so long ago. It's still a defining "Sped moment" for me. When you post most anything, I remember that this is a woman who will do an interpretive dance if you bore her too much.

*laughs*

Love you, Sped.

[spedbug.livejournal.com]

:D
Love you, too!