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I had a doctor's appointment, yesterday, to discuss the care and feeding of my plantar warts. They've been around so long and are so tenaciously entrenched, I figure they're mine for life. They are like the Supermen of warts - they've been frozen and lasered multiple times and withstand it without flinching. Last time I was in the doctor's office, the nurse-practioner held the liquid nitrogen wand against the wart on the pad of my pointer finger for a full minute as we chatted. I never felt it.
As someone who's had warts frozen in the past, that's not normal. Usually, if the wart is 'normal' (not a subterranean plantar type), you don't feel the liquid nitrogen for a second or two but, then, it hurts like hell. You have to sit there and soldier through the death of some healthy tissue, however, or the wart won't die. If all is successful, a blister forms a minute later and about a week later, the blister withers and drops off, taking the wart along with it.
"So, are you going to freeze them, again, or are you sending me to a dermatologist to have them lasered again?" (The laser, by the way, feels like someone's pulled back a giant rubber band and then snaps it against the area being treated. Repeatedly. Again, one must be a soldier.)
"Here's what I think we'll do. . ." he says, scribbling out a prescription "I want you to apply this cream..."
My heart sinks. I've been prescribed this cream before for a wart on the bottom of my foot. It didn't work. "Doctor, I've got my hands in water, constantly . . ."
"No, no," he replies with a smile, "The cream is only used at night, while you sleep. You put some on right before bed, cover it with duct tape and then remove it in the morning."
Duct tape?
"It'll starve the wart of oxygen," the doctor assures me. "Then, in two weeks, you come back and we'll see what's left over. We can cut out what's dead with a scalpel and then freeze what's left behind."
Gee, that sounds like fun, doesn't it kiddies?! Buck up, little soldier, it'll all be over soon.
Let me just say, here, that I'm pretty determined when it comes to getting rid of my warts. The two that were on the bottom of my right foot finally pushed me to take a stand. I bought a bottle of Compound W (which is basically acid), put it on religiously until, one day (don't read on if you're squeamish), I managed to hook my finger under the edge of the deadened skin and pulled the warts out, root and all!! Hoorah! Success!! But...my mind starts questioning. Is it really all gone? Probably not. Those warts are wiley, they are. Just to be sure I didn't miss any warty cells, I took the Compound W and dripped some into the holes. JESUS, MARY AND JOSEPH!!! Who dropped the live coal into this wound in my foot?! When my heart stopped racing and I was sure I wasn't going to pass out, I put another few drops in. What? I had to be sure they were gone. (I still have marks where they were but I don't feel like I'm walking on pebbles anymore so I guess they're gone).
Off I go to the pharmacy to fill my prescription. Now, before I continue on, I have to tell you that the cream I've been prescribed is Aldara cream, commonly prescribed for genital warts. The first doctor that prescribed this to me, for my foot, explained that it was discovered plantars warts also respond to it.
So, I drop off the prescription and ask, "Do you sell duct tape?" I'm directed to aisle 3. I wander off and find a pumice stone, as well, which I'm supposed to apply to the one raised wart I'm treating along with the three plantar-type.
When I come back to the counter, the pharmacist asks, "Did your doctor give you instructions on how to use this?"
"Yes," I reply, "he said to apply the cream at night, before bed, and then wrap the area in duct tape."
Oh. Oh my. If you could have been there to see the pharmacist's face. It went from politely circumspect to . . oh, I know I'm not going to do it justice. His face just *fell* out of this small, put-on, polite smile and he looked . . .lost. Totally adrift in socially unchartered waters. I had to let it go for about fifteen seconds. It was too much fun watching him try to compute what I'd just said --"Her doctor wants her to put duct tape on her . . .!" -- to not enjoy it for a moment.
"I have plantars warts on the pads of my fingers," I finally say, showing him one very prominent one, "My doctor says they respond to Aldara cream but using the duct tape helps cut off the oxygen, too, which hastens the process."
"Oh," he replies, face flooding with relief. "Oh!" he chuckles, "I'd heard something about duct tape helping get rid of warts. Now the duct tape makes sense."
So, what dear-hearts, do you think he first thought I was doing with the duct tape?
Genital wart cream
Duct tape
Pumice stone
Kiiiiiiiiinnnnnkkkkkkkkkkky! ;)
As someone who's had warts frozen in the past, that's not normal. Usually, if the wart is 'normal' (not a subterranean plantar type), you don't feel the liquid nitrogen for a second or two but, then, it hurts like hell. You have to sit there and soldier through the death of some healthy tissue, however, or the wart won't die. If all is successful, a blister forms a minute later and about a week later, the blister withers and drops off, taking the wart along with it.
"So, are you going to freeze them, again, or are you sending me to a dermatologist to have them lasered again?" (The laser, by the way, feels like someone's pulled back a giant rubber band and then snaps it against the area being treated. Repeatedly. Again, one must be a soldier.)
"Here's what I think we'll do. . ." he says, scribbling out a prescription "I want you to apply this cream..."
My heart sinks. I've been prescribed this cream before for a wart on the bottom of my foot. It didn't work. "Doctor, I've got my hands in water, constantly . . ."
"No, no," he replies with a smile, "The cream is only used at night, while you sleep. You put some on right before bed, cover it with duct tape and then remove it in the morning."
Duct tape?
"It'll starve the wart of oxygen," the doctor assures me. "Then, in two weeks, you come back and we'll see what's left over. We can cut out what's dead with a scalpel and then freeze what's left behind."
Gee, that sounds like fun, doesn't it kiddies?! Buck up, little soldier, it'll all be over soon.
Let me just say, here, that I'm pretty determined when it comes to getting rid of my warts. The two that were on the bottom of my right foot finally pushed me to take a stand. I bought a bottle of Compound W (which is basically acid), put it on religiously until, one day (don't read on if you're squeamish), I managed to hook my finger under the edge of the deadened skin and pulled the warts out, root and all!! Hoorah! Success!! But...my mind starts questioning. Is it really all gone? Probably not. Those warts are wiley, they are. Just to be sure I didn't miss any warty cells, I took the Compound W and dripped some into the holes. JESUS, MARY AND JOSEPH!!! Who dropped the live coal into this wound in my foot?! When my heart stopped racing and I was sure I wasn't going to pass out, I put another few drops in. What? I had to be sure they were gone. (I still have marks where they were but I don't feel like I'm walking on pebbles anymore so I guess they're gone).
Off I go to the pharmacy to fill my prescription. Now, before I continue on, I have to tell you that the cream I've been prescribed is Aldara cream, commonly prescribed for genital warts. The first doctor that prescribed this to me, for my foot, explained that it was discovered plantars warts also respond to it.
So, I drop off the prescription and ask, "Do you sell duct tape?" I'm directed to aisle 3. I wander off and find a pumice stone, as well, which I'm supposed to apply to the one raised wart I'm treating along with the three plantar-type.
When I come back to the counter, the pharmacist asks, "Did your doctor give you instructions on how to use this?"
"Yes," I reply, "he said to apply the cream at night, before bed, and then wrap the area in duct tape."
Oh. Oh my. If you could have been there to see the pharmacist's face. It went from politely circumspect to . . oh, I know I'm not going to do it justice. His face just *fell* out of this small, put-on, polite smile and he looked . . .lost. Totally adrift in socially unchartered waters. I had to let it go for about fifteen seconds. It was too much fun watching him try to compute what I'd just said --"Her doctor wants her to put duct tape on her . . .!" -- to not enjoy it for a moment.
"I have plantars warts on the pads of my fingers," I finally say, showing him one very prominent one, "My doctor says they respond to Aldara cream but using the duct tape helps cut off the oxygen, too, which hastens the process."
"Oh," he replies, face flooding with relief. "Oh!" he chuckles, "I'd heard something about duct tape helping get rid of warts. Now the duct tape makes sense."
So, what dear-hearts, do you think he first thought I was doing with the duct tape?
Genital wart cream
Duct tape
Pumice stone
Kiiiiiiiiinnnnnkkkkkkkkkkky! ;)
Duct tape as a ...fashion statement?
He made himself a suit plus a top hat and the girl had a street length dress. My husband laughed because, as he said, think of all those kids who paid hundreds of dollars for their rented tuxedos and their prom dresses and the one couple that gets their photo on the front page of the paper made their clothes from duct tape. :D
They looked pretty darn good too considering what their clothes were made from.
no subject
I wish I had seen his face!
no subject
That was great! Oh how I wish I could've seen his face!
Bwahahahahahaha!
no subject
Actually, my doctor told me something similar when I was a kid and I had a wart on my toe - he said I should put a band-aid on to starve it of oxygen. It must have worked - I don't have a wart on my toe any more :-)
I wore duct tape once
*The things these eyes have seen*
Your warts sound terribly affectionate. (((SpeddY)))
Re: I wore duct tape once
Now there is a horrible typo. Sounds like something an embarrassing uncle might say. Boobs, boobs, I meant BOOBS. :)
I figured "boobas" were like "tubas" - large and in need of strong lip action
Two questions:
Did the duct tape hurt at all when removed from your 'salient points'?
and
If it was a fishnet catsuit and the lower half sported a tutu, did you have to duct tape salient points south, as well? I know that would have to hurt on removal unless one was freshly ...er..de-furred.